


Veela Hat

by FairyNiamh



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-20 19:47:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14268273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FairyNiamh/pseuds/FairyNiamh
Summary: A very fake Harry Potter advertisement.





	Veela Hat

**Author's Note:**

> Back in 2006, Eeyore9990 stared a crack round robin, featuring the characters of Harry Potter appearing on the Jerry Springer show. Even though there were 6 of us writing, we did not finish. That's okay, we still had fun. I won't share the 'story', but I will (finally) share the commercial break I wrote. I will admit that I tweaked and expanded this a little. If you are expecting anything resembling seriousness, you are in for a giant plate of disappointment.

Have you had a hard day? Are your kids running around wild? Is your boss screaming at you for writing or reading slash stories while at work? Does your spouse just not 'get' you or your fascination with wizards and witches?

Then you need the Veela Hat! Yes, the Veela Hat. Put it on, say anything, and watch the people around you swoon and follow after you for just flinging your hair, asking for help, or betting your eyelashes at a man, woman, supernatural beings; heck, even your cat will follow you around like a puppy.

Just see how the Veela Hat has changed lives:

_'I was having such a hard time in my life. I felt that no one loved, let alone liked me. Always at home and never invited to parties. Then I bought the Veela Hat and now I am having the time of my life!'_

_'I had no game or sex life; and lusted after two different men. After trying the Veela Hat, I got them both! THANK YOU, Veela Hat!'_

Buy it today and see how the Veela Hat could change **YOUR** life.

Veela Hat is yours for the low price of $79.95 (plus $30.00 shipping and handling)

Call 1-899-555-9823

Operators are standing by. Call now and ask how Veela Hat could change your life.

That's 1-899-555-9823 (Sorry no refunds or exchanges.)

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.

~Fin~


End file.
